What do I have to say today?

Don't go to doctors. Living in a socialist healthcare system, I go to doctors all the time. They rarely do me any good, and the good they do do me ins't worth the hassle or the pain. Tuesday they shoved a hose down my throat to take tissue samples from my gut: endoscopy. Absolutely devestating, even though he told me it wouldn't hurt at all, and my throat still hurts from the procedure after two days, I'm begining to think it's infected. Guess what the brilliant conclusion of the test was: I've got a little heatburn. Thank you Doctor Deduction, you goddam genius.

Then Dr. Ear-Nose-Throat tells me I've got a hypoatrophied tonsil, I don't know, which may be causing some other problems I've developed recently. That tonsil's been like that forever, though, I told her. But it still might be responsible. Without testing it to find out if it is responsible (an easy procedure, I soon learned), she recommended I have it removed. Why not, it's free?

Oh, and get this: the clinic no longer supplies containers for urine samples, you have to bring them from home! They gave me a note, said to bring back the sample in a clean container with the note and leave it in the Pee Test Reception window. Well, it's their own fault they get to handle pee covered jars now. How am I supposed to know which of my jars are air tight and which ones are leaky? And thank God I never throw any jars away! In your face special lady, I told you they'll come in handy one day!