Alice? Who the fuck is Alice?!

I don't know if everybody in the States knows the Ray Brown dirty version of the song Living Next Door to Alice, but nobody in Riga does. I know this cause when Uncle Bob and I were there eight years ago and shouted along the dirty part in an ourside beer garden, every Latvian in the house was staring at us.

I remember this today because the cabbie this morning on the way to work was playing it. I asked him if he'd drive me back home first so I could copy it; he just lent it to me.

Now, if you like shenanigans with paper and pencil, check this out!

Brussel Sprouts Have Landed

I consider my greatest achievements in the kitchen to be preparing something my special lady likes that she never liked till I made it for her. These have included brocolli, fish, corn and bell peppers. Onions too, but I add those secretly so she doesn't realize yet that she has grown fond of onions. The trickest so far has been brussel sprouts. Steamed, baked, boiled, parboiled, buttered, cheese-covered, salted, salted-buttered, cheese-buttered...no luck! Finally I managed to serve them up so she liked 'em yesterday:

1. warm 3T olive oil in a pan on medium low temp
2. immediatly add 1T red pepper flakes (I would have thrown in a garlic clove but I couldn't find one)
3. when they start to blacken, remove them with a flat spatule
4. add so much breadcrumbs that they soak up all the oil; if you add too much add some butter to soak the remainder
5. if sensitive to the sound of wook scraping on metal, insert earplugs
6. work the mass around a bit with the spatula
7. add cored, halved brussel sprouts and continue working around; add 1t salt; cover for a minute and work around and cover, work, cover, work, cover, work for 6 minutes

She totally like it.

My Own Backyard

I found a list of the top ten diners in America to use for a class about English speaking countries and their cultures. Here's one that I can reminisce about getting breakfast at:

O'Rourke's
728 Main Street, Middletown, Connecticut
860-346-6101

At the far end of Middletown's Main Street, O'Rourke's is a 1946 silver-sided treasure with counter stools and worn-smooth marble counter. Although it's old and a bit rickety-looking, it is a head-turner of gleaming stainless steel, as well as a fantastic place to eat. The menu includes mid-Connecticut's unique steamed cheeseburgers, southwestern dishes made with chili that chef Brian O'Rourke imports from New Mexico, and local shad roe in the spring, when he barters meals to get the best of local fishermen's catch. Waffles, pancakes, and French toast (made from freshly baked bread) make Sunday brunch especially good, but expect to wait for a seat.

Golfing is the Sport of Whom? Rich People.

We got a free pass to the driving range and a lesson that I used last weekend. My special lady was busy, so I took Tadas Vyšniauskas with me. It was hell getting there, it's in the middle of nowhere, we literally had to spend a while going down a dirt road. He'd never played before, and I haven't played for many years. We did alright though, me hitting 150 with the driver about half the time. He hit it that well sometimes too, and we each almost hit the 200 mark once.

On the putting green he thought he'd best me, so we bet a beer on it. I won that one. Then we bet on who could get it in from a certain distance with less strokes, and I won that too. I lost the rematch, so we had some beer buying for each other on the schedule.

Anyway, can you imagine how expensive it is to actually golf? Before you can golf you have to pass a test and get a green card, which costs 900 litas, that's $340. After you pay that, if you want to become a member, it'll be $14,000. This is in a country where the average wage is $600 a month.

A Fountain of Knowledge

We tried one of these drinking games with Animal House last night...fun!

I lost my lunch...literally!

Well not exactly, but I left it at home twice in one morning...how stupid is that? I made a tuna sandwich and packed it with half a liter of tomato juice in my cooler-lunchbox. Then I went to work without it. At 10:15 I had to drop off the car at the mechanic and take a cab back to work. The mechanic's close to home, so I decided to stop by and grab my lunch and some papers. I grabbed the papers and forgot the lunch again! What the hell! Now I'm gonna have to have a tuna sandwich for dinner instead of tacos! That sucks! Tacos're way better!! Dammit!!!

p.s. I had the sandwich as soon as I got home and the tacos a couple hours later...

Adding Spinach to Dune Casserole is a good way to get more Spinach in your diet

One thing I forgot from Darius and Ellen's wedding is this. See, Darius was planning to wear a tux, so I was too. He changed his mind with several days left, but we were already on route, and my special lady had planned to match my level of elegance...with just the luggage we had, we couldn't change. So oddly, the the most formal wardrobe that evening wasn't worn at the alter, it was at the Krupnikas Toast.

So this camera man came up to me early on and asked me if I'm the groom. Of course I say, "Yes."

He explains that he works for the vinyard we're at and they are making a promotional ad about the place a site for weddings. Would I give him permission to film some of the festivities and use it for the vignette? I respond, "Will I be able to get a copy of the raw footage?"

He guesses I will. "Well, there's a few things I'd really like included, then," I explain, "which you probably won't use for your movie, but I'd like in the raw footage you'll give me. It won't take long. Just get a decent shot of all the good cleavage in the house. Then I'll point out a few guys, you go up behind them and kick them in the ass, and film their indignation; tell them it's all part of the show. Okay?"

Shocked, he mutters about just wanting some candid shots. "Well, if you want something so humdrum, I'm not interested. Why don't you ask the real groom? He's right over there!"

I haven't had any straight soda (or pop for you goofuses)

besides rootbeer in many years, but I might start if Lithuania starts importing this one.

Coffee's for Suckers...and people who wake up early

After two months of no coffee this summer, I decided if I'm ever going to quit drinking coffee it'll be much better now than later. I was afraid that as soon as I started working, I'd need it. But I didn't. Until today. I was fine with tea until today. Today I had to get up as 6 a.m. (God, no!) I've had two strong cups of black tea, but at 10:40 I'm already brewing a third. Yawn. I have a colleague who used to drink coffee alot and quit, she inspired me to do this, pretty much. Well, I hope it doesn't take too much longer. However, my schedules getting a little jumbled around, and it looks like my early classes will probably get moved. I'll never have to wake up so early again!

Watch TV or Beware!

Next time a special somebody, I don't know, possibly let's say your wife, turns the TV down so quiet you can't hardly hear it, just turn it back up when she goes to the bathroom. DO NOT turn it off and just start reading diet books about good nutrition right before bedtime. You'll end up having nightmares about Flavanoids and Polysomethings and Ascorbic Acid and Carotenoids and Folate and Omega 3 Fatty Acids. If you don't fall asleep and have nightmares about them, you'll lay awake tossing and turning, wondering how the hell you can possibly get blueberries and spinich into your diet every day! I'm telling you...just put the TV back on...