So after three months we finally had plans to go meet some women Saturday. Milana is really into French, and she has some friends, Agne and Jurgita, so I came along too. Before this we made kugelis, which is an extremely Lithuanian potato with bacon casserole dish. It was long and hard, but turned out very well. It was especially hard because we don’t have a potato grating machine. And the potatoes have to be finely grated while raw. So we both ended up with grated thumbs and fingers. We have no measuring cups but for kugelis you don’t have to measure anything; my aunt laughed when I asked her about measurements. She said “you just put in as much as you want to eat.”
So we bought some nice wine and went to see them. It was also the first time we didn't purposefully pregame before leaving the dorm. It was fun. Agne was cute, and Jurgita was hot-hot (Cedric agreed, and he's bloody French; I don't know what I mean by that). They were all alot of fun, we chatted, drank the wine; they were drinking brand when we got there, and after the wine was gone we helped them polish that off. Then we were off to these girls' haunt, Kurpiai. It's a nice jazz bar which is well known throughout Lithuania and elsewhere in Europe even. It's the first bar I ever went to in Klaipeda this year, and that time it was full to the brim with sailors, who were throwing money around while in port. So I let them buy me beers.
This time was better. This band was playing that we'd heard in another bar in Vilnius the previous weekend, they were awesome. It was totally crowded though. And the bartender messed up our order. And waitresses kept bumping into us. And this older guy, probably a shameless American, was dancing in a fashion that caused his ass to bump into both mine and Cedric's in rhythm. We we like "wow, who's the homosexual?" I think he understood us because he stopped doing that. He was there again last night by the way.
Then we went to Prieplauka, which is more like a club. It's actually quite clublike: usually a cover and there's a coat room; large dance floor with booths at the walls; a second floor above the booths with tables but not covering the dance floor. It's "dec." There we drank alot of beer, played quarters upstairs (with various lithuanian coins; i left my quarters at home) and all danced alot, especially me and Agne.
And then we were tired. After successfully staying soberish for many hours the beers caught up with us: it was barf burp time! We left and the girls let us get into a cab first, possibly sense that we were drunk fucks in need of some rest. Between walking out of Prieplauka and getting home there were several barf burps, and I even reached for the window opener a couple times. That was funny.
In the morning I had received in my cell phone this messege from myself: "when my elbow fell off the table cedric rag are you ok?"
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3 comments:
hey, i saved some of the sms's you sent while i was in lietuva. i was wondering if you mind if i post them on my site... :)
why don't you post them here and if i don't delete them it means they are acceptable. here's a couple i sent to myself this weekend:
"pop sicke ice sickle?"
"I say this girl, she looks like epicmb"
-You know what's funny? When you"re taking a piss and you throw your tie over your shoulder so it don't get in the way, but you forget about it and there s no mirror in the men's room so you leave but then you remember on the way out, but a couple of your students notice you flip it back...
-You know what's the best? When you're wearing tight undies cause boxer shorts show through your suit pants, and you try to rearrange you junk, but the elastic slips from your grasp and slams you in the ballsack. It's the best.
-It 's great when you're goofing around with a girl, pushing her chair, and then she elbows you in the junk,and it makes you fart really loud, and then you make a weird face while you try to figure out if you need to run to the bathroom. It's just great.....
-You know what's awesome? When you're ducking a girl, but you have to stop in the migdele, and take the condom off to take a piss cause you frank so much beer..that's awesome!!!
-I've been having these devil-spawned rancid farts coming outta my asshole all day, reminiscent of the time my fecal odor made someone dry heave… :(
-You know what's better that sticking your cock in somebodys gas tank?nada!!they start2drive away n u start screaming and pumping so fast…best orgasm ever!!
-Know whats awesome? When u fart so hard it blows you into another dimention, where all the chicks are hot n naked and youre always drunk n stoned-don’t u think?
-I have when I take a shit and my tie hangs down into the toilet fowl through my legs and a monster grabs on and climb up and bites me on the balls…..
-I love when I blow my more on my thumb and my snot is bigger via my thumb and I lord my thumb in it and the snot starts eating away my hand cause it's crazy!
-Someday, when I get credit on my phone, ill send U this messege: Im shitting, n there's nothing2read, cause I can't let students see of bring books 2 shitter
I've decided, after thinking aboutfucking this forty year old married teacher for an hour, that hiding boners is another good reason to year tighties to work..!
-You know what's funny!? Rastenis woke up with "kibinas" tattooed on his penis, and only later remembered why: He stuck one up his ass and loved it all night!
-My hand still hurts. You're gay. Wad. Let's drink vodka tonight!
-I'm taking my last shit at work for four days..I better make it a good one!
-Concentrate..concentrate..concentrate..Oh no! I think I gave myself a purple sock!
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