UPDATE: I've added photos to the last three blog entries. I'll give a fiver to the first person who can guess which four of the Easter Eggs were made by me.

ANOTHER UPDATE: I posed this same question to my students, with the prize as getting to skip the next quiz. The chance of winning with random guessing is 1 in 5,040. I only have fifteen students, so I guess the chance of one of them winning is 1 in 336 (I can't remember if that's how the calculation goes). One did win and got to walk out on the quiz that day.

Easter Feaster Day 2

On the second day of Easter we made these fabulous recipes:

scotch eggs

carrot raisin cake with irish cream frosting

The Scotch Eggs I first tasted at Dubliner, a Vilnius pub Gedas took me to, so I made them because of all the left over eggs and because Gedas was coming over that day. And the carrot cake I made because Juste was obv coming over too, and she loves that. I brought half the carrot cake over to gims, they all loved it, it was the only dish out of over a dozen to get big compliments. The Eggs were not nerely as much work as I though they would be, I'll definately add them to my menu bimonthly or trimonthly. Next time I'll make the spicy mustard sauce some of the reviews recommend. This time I'd already made a honey mustard sauce for the scones, so I just used that, and it was very good.

Good Priest

"Yo, God is good, and He wants you to be good too, and if you're not He's gonna come down here and bust your freakin skull!"--New Yorker priest in Family Guy

What my priest at the Holy Stanislaw Church in Riešė said was almost as good as that. We had the little procession around the church, went inside, listened to the hymn while the priest did the incense around the front. Then the priest comes up to the pulpit and says "Nu, viskas." (Well, that's all.) Everybody looks at him and around in disbelief; it's only been 20 minutes. "What, you want more? You want a prayer?" Yes, everybody shouts! "You just want a prayer, or do you want some holy water?!" Yes yes, holy water! "I see, you're not here for the prayers at all, you just want me to bless your food, eh?" (Many people had brought easter eggs to church to be blessed) Yes, bless our food! "Alright, fine, but don't say I didn't warn you!"

The priest then proceeded to walk around literally dousing everybody with holy water. But hey, we were in and out in thirty minutes with no alms-giving. Can't beat that!

Easter Feaster

Here's the delicious menu from the first day of Easter, serving 5 1/2 people, everything was fabulous except for the bulka:

margučiai (waxed and painted hard boiled eggs eaten after the Big Battle of the Eggs ,the official begining of dinner)

roast pork loin and potatoes (mine was 9 1/2 pounds)

savory easter cheese pies from kimolos

cheddar scones with ham and honey-mustard butter

white mišrainė (lithuanian potato salad)

"aš-nežinau-mišrainė" (lithuanian cole slaw like layered vegetable salad minus the cabbage plus herring)

spinach tomato salad

double-peanut double-chocolate chip cookies

bulka

table

Notstalgia

Yesterday evening I followed up Monday's nostalgia with Further Down the Spiral, by Nine Incha Nails. It reminded me of how impressed Rachel was that I had both albums, since most people would only have one or the other. Nice memory, but the music is no longer enjoyable. I can't believe I ever liked it. Several times I had to check to make sure it wasn't stuck on a one second loop.

Nostalgia

Yesterday evening I listened to Pink Floyd live and Nine Inch Nails' Downward Spiral. It was pretty awesome. Floyd came on unexpectedly in my play list, and before realizing that it was Floyd, I thought to myself, man, this CCR really sounds like Pink Floyd! Then I though it would funny if we were in high school again, or just acting like it, and Peanut said that out loud and Sean had said That might be because it is Pink Floyd. Then we'd all chuckle. After that album I skipped down to Nine Inch Nails, because when I saw March of the Pigs I remembered when we translated that song into Lithuanian for our evening Salute to camp Neringa: Darius climbed up on a rock and screeched the lyrics at the counselor, and the rest of us formed a mosh pit. Man, that's gonna be awesome when I transplant my brain into a fifteen year old clone of myself and do that again.

Burton/Deppathon

Saturday afternoon my special lady and I went to see Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street. It was awesome, and all the singing made me feel like we was doing something more sophisticated than going to the movies and eating crab sticks and tartar sauce that I snuck in from the store. All the blood made her feel like we were doing something far less enjoyable than anything she could think of. So if you're not classy, or you don't like blood and guts, then it's not for you.

Then my special lady went out with some non-special ladies to discuss menses, or something, I don't know. I went to pick up my special baby at kindergarten and get some ice cream on the way home. When we got there we watched Corpse Bride, which is one of her favorite movies. Because of the Burton/Deppathon I decided to pay more attention to it than usual. I noticed a bunch of funny little jokes that you miss if you're not paying attention, as I'm most often not to her various entertainment. However, though the story may be better, I do prefer the songs in The Nightmare Before Christmas.

Sunday afternoon before going to church we watched Edward Scissorhands, which I hadn't seen for a decade or more. Interesting juxtaposition between this and the first movie of the weekend: in Sweeney Depp is super vocal, singing or speaking practically constantly; in Scissorhands I don't think he said even 100 words. Very enjoyable: very fairy-tale, but very full of non-fairy-tale elements too. Like the simpsons!

Attention Surplus Advantage

Here's an anti-disorder I seem to have! My special lady remarked last night that she's never seen anybody read five books at once before. She said she'd feel rather scatter-brained if she kept switching back and forth. No problem for me: I usually have two non-fiction going in my Klaipeda bathroom, currently We Are Not Alone (in my sidebar) and God Stories, one or two non-fiction in my Vilnius bathroom, currently Mere Christianity, one or two fiction and one or two non-fiction in my bedroom, and sometimes a biography, one of which I'll take with me most of where I go, currently Stranger in a Strange Lange, The Omnivore's Dilemma, Aristotle for Everybody and Leadership, and two non-fiction in the car for when I have to wait for somebody, currently The Best Travels Writing of 2006 and The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

So I'm actually in the middle reading nine books right now, though in any given week I probably only pick up four or five of them. However, I picked up Aristotle last night for the first time in about six weeks, and I jumped right in where I'd left off without having to scroll back to get back on the train of though: I simply hadn't lost it. I can do that with all the books I'm reading, as long as there's a book mark in the right place. And this reminded me of another thing.

Six years ago Sarunas and I had a conversation about how annoying it is that women tend to chat through the bathroom door, as if you're not busy reading in there while you're sitting on the toilet. And Sarunas mentioned that he has to plan his time going to the bathroom, because he hates to stop reading in the middle of a chapter, he has to read the whole thing, so it might take a while. I was really surprised by this: "Really? I just stop reading wherever I am, even mid-paragraph. Hell, sometimes I stop reading mid-sentence!" That's true. I guess it's not a problem for me because of my increadible Attention Surplus Advantage!

Where not to buy your gas

I wouldn't normally go to Lukoil, but we were almost out of gas coming back from the countryside and we had to stop. I gave her a twenty and proceeded to fill the tank, but it only filled to 19.99. So I looked at the receipt: sure enough, she rung it up as less than I paid without giving me my penny! Soviet Bitch! Just because I got out of the passenger's side doesn't mean I'm so drunk I'll skip my change! I marched right up there and got my cent.

A loft apartment over a really great party...

Why doesn't Canada change its name to Comeda? Then at least the people would be called Comedians...at least then they'd have something going for them...

Secretary Chuck Norris?!

I used to think Huckabee was serious about becoming president until he said this: “In my administration there would be room for a Secretary of Defense named Chuck Norris!”

The Most Important Vote of 2008

I've got 128 days left to Svente. I tried to fit into my tauties (national costume) last night. I'm about 2.5 inches too fat. I proposed a simple solution; my special lady countered with a much more difficult and arduous solution. I won't say whose is whose, but I'd like you to vote on which option you think I should pursue:

• Use a buttion-in patch of fabric to extend the waiste, or
• Lose 20+ pounds in the 128 days remaining.

p.s. here's why this will be your most important vote!

Laughing at Retards?

I guess growing up in America, I didn't develope a sense of humor for laughing at retarded folks. One of my colleagues was just telling another colleague about a conversation she had with a retard, and they were both laughing pretty hard about his inability to communicate properly. I don't know, I didn't find it highlarious. Or maybe I'm just not in the mood!

I already knew this...

...cause I saw it on Penn and Teller's Bullshit show, but I like this article too.

Dos and Don'ts of a Trip to Italy

• Do expect to eat pizza at least once a day.
• Don't leave home without soap and shampoo and every other toiletry besides toilet paper. Even if you run out of that, all the toilets have butt washes.
• Do get the spicy pasta, though all the pastas are great.
• Don't get frustrated when it takes hours to find the restaurant you're looking for, all the best places are well-hidden.
• Do buy three pounds of sausage to bring home, it's awesome!
• Don't miss the Parthenon, or the crypt, what's it called, weinerschnitzel
• Do start taking a siesta from day one, lest you be off kilter with all the shops, which are closed from 1-4 p.m. for lunch.
• Don't visit during one of the ecological days, when driving a car is forbidden; if you do this by accident, do not walk the kilometer to the trainstation with your 26.5 kg. suitcase.

Formerly Painful Brain Surgury

I assume without checking that the HBO show Rome is historically accurate. I find it surprising, therefore, that they performed brain surgery in ancient Rome. And I find it disturbing that they did it with no apparent anesthetic. Most disturbing of all is that they actually show it graphically on HBO. Who wants to see glass bits pulled from a brain and a metal plate inserted below a man's head flesh? Not me.

Luckily the show provides much more graphic sex than brain surgery; I don't mind that so much. I guess I'll keep watching.

UPDATE: Liepa found out that the brain surgery was authentic.

The View from the Glasgow Tour Bus

Can't tell what this lovely scene is? Here's a closer up look:

Real Pain

If youve never picked up a bed by accident when you were trying to just lift up the matress and dropped the whole wooden thing on your foot, you've never felt real pain!

Strategic Command (1997) is the most ridiculous rip off ever. The Imdb comment states it's a rip off of Air Force One and Executive Decision, which I haven't seen. What I have seen, one of the most watchable movies ever (you can watch it once a month, it doesn't get old), is The Rock (1996). Let's see if I can remember all the matching plot points:

• renegade soldiers break into a facility and steal chemical weapons
• one soldier drops one and is sealed in the chamber to his doom
• a chemical expert is dispached with U.S. soldiers to neutralize the threat
• the soldiers resent being accompanied by an amateur and the one assaigned to watch him gives him a talking to about it
• his fiance/wife, who has just become pregnant, is in harm's way
• a city in California is being held hostage in return for exactly $100,000,000
• only two good guys, the chemical expert and one soldier, make it to the final battle
• the chemical expert defeats the bad guy by smearing him with the chemical, which eats his lungs from the inside
• the expert then has to inject himself in the spine with the anditode (i guess in the rock it's in the heart, so that's actually a big difference)

Real Pain

You never felt real pain unless you've felt this: my special lady gave me a bite of a breadstick on Saturday, and I bit off enough of it that she had to regrip it before pulling it back. She accidentally got a bunch of my whiskers under her thumb when she regripped, and tore half my lip off trying to get her bread stick back. Well, that's what it felt like, though there wasn't acually any blood or tearing of anything...besides breadstick.