Friday, September 19, 2008

How do you say Kosher in Muslim?

Yesterday I took five guests to Neringa, first stop: Hill of Witches. We had been working together for a few days but no dinners, no chances to chill out together. So I had brough with me a bottle of Green 999s, which is a knock off of Jagermeister. There are several points along the trail though the forest when a drink is in order, and after the second shot they asked if it has chocolate in it, and if not, what makes it so sweet. "No, it's not chocolate, it has..." I was about to say blood. The blood of a ram, or steer, or elk, or something. It's just a myth but maybe if would make them not want to drink it, cause don't one or all of those animals have cloven hooves? Are those animals not kosher for Muslims just like Jews, or what's the deal with that? I didn't have time to figure that out, so I just said "sugar" (the truth anyway). 

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Both Jewish and Muslim food rules can be quite similar, both religions drain the blood from animals... as far as I know it's a traditional thing rather than a religion thing per se because back in the old days the only way to get people to adhere to health rules was to put a religious aspect on it (also the likely reason why its Muslim traditions to wash your hands after almost everything)

Liepa said...

my muslim roommate natyra says muslims adopted the no pork rule because a prophet declared no one shall eat the only animal who eats its own droppings.

Aras said...

there are certainly other animals that do that. that just their alleged prophet wasn't all that omniscient after all.

Anonymous said...

the punchline is that muslims can't drink alcohol at all, regardless of how it is made.

Aras said...

i don't remember ever meeting a muslim who didn't drink, at least beer if not hard liquor.

Anonymous said...

Catholics aren't supposed to have premarital sex as much as Muslims aren't supposed to drink alcohol

Anyway, this link is pretty explanatory

http://www.themodernreligion.com/misc/hh/pork.html

Aras said...

Catholics aren't supposed to have premarital sex as much as Muslims aren't supposed to drink alcohol

I wouldn't say that's the same! One is forbidden altogether, the other's just getting ahead of yourself.

That website about pork is literally retarded, incidentally, like full retard. There are plenty of cultures in the world who eat dogs or cats. And as for all those health problems, my brother eats pork 2-3 times a day: he's thin and healthy!

Plus, I've got a question for you, Bismillah Walhamdulillah Was Salaatu Was Salaam: if you are what you eat, then what would rather eat/be than a pig? A vegetable? That's fun. How about a fruit? Great. How about a nut? I guess that wouldn't be too much of a stretch, since you're already nuts.

And another question, Bismillah Walhamdulillah Was Salaatu Was Salaam: you said that "We insult a person by calling him or her a 'Pig'"; the list of foods that double as insults goes far beyond the ones I already mentioned: cracker, oreo cookie, bananas, chicken, cow, cock, meatball, turkey, potato head, monkey, donkey, sour grapes, tiger penis, et cetera; so which of these are you/do you eat?

In conclusion, there's clearly nothing better than eating pig all the time. In honor of this asshole, I vow to eat at least three different types of pork this weekend.

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